There are only few things which are more painful than loving someone you can't have.This person means everything to you in your life,he is the one who brings smile on your face,his presence gives you immense pleasure,everything seems like fairy tale when he is around but....he is the person who's clearly in love with someone else,you know that he is not your's,you know he will not be there standing with you holding your hand,he will not beside you in your good times,he will not marry you rather will marry some other girl and you know these things ,there’s no escaping the pain of being with him and knowing that you can never have him.
At the same time you love him but you also know that you can't have him,this is the pain.At times you ask yourself why you’re subjecting yourself to this kind of torture. And the answer is : you love him. To all those who are in this kind of relationships where you know that you can't have him in your life for ever ,for those who are dying every second inside and still keep on loving though they know their feelings would not make any difference to them, I would suggest you to start making difference in your life and come out of pain.Don't embrace pain, embrace smile,embrace happiness in your life.Let go things.
How to handle the pain of loving someone you can't have
It is difficult for you to stop loving him but if you have decided to be with someone you love knowing the fact that you can't have him,then only thing you can do is to handle the pain that goes with it.
Do not ask any questions that could hurt you
The aim is to avoid any painful situation ,so avoid questioning him about how much he loves you or whether he loves you or not,avoid these types of question when you have answers somewhere in your mind.These questions could only hurt you because even if you get a reply that " yes I do" ,you know he loves someone else.
Don't ask for more.
Don't demand anything more from him.Do not expect anything from him,because it is your decision to be in this situation knowing all the facts ,so stop expecting things from him.Condition your mind only to focus on good times.
It is time to take out some time for yourself.
Stop thinking about him all the time,you will end up with disappointments after analysing thoughts in deep. Indulge in some activities you like ,which gives you joy.You will realise that doing some creative work is taking you away from pain slowly.
Stay away from distressing situations.
If you know that he's going to be with his partner somewhere, don’t show up.Why would you go?Don't pretend to be very strong because you only know how much painful it will be to see your love with somebody else. It’s like committing suicide. You can just decline their invitation and be at peace. Doing nothing at home and just sitting will be much better than seeing the person you love with somebody else.
It is OKAY to not pretend that you’re not okay.
You don’t have to pretend all time that you’re okay,if you are not. Please don't do it anymore. Don't know for how long you have been going through this pain but you’ve been dealing with a fake smile all the time,you don't need to do this for always.It is okay to tell him that it hurts,you can't always be part of his world where you are not his world anymore.
Limit talk as much as you can.
Yes, even if seeing him and talking to him makes you “happy” ,you must learn to let go things that gives you temporary happiness and be definitely okay with missing out.Remember if it makes you sad you’re not missing anything! It is now time to do yourself a big favor and protect your emotions.
Be surrounded by friends.
Because you need sound advice, loving arms and craziness of your best buds during times of emotional turmoil,be surrounded by friends.
" You were never supposed to mean this much to me;I was never supposed to fall so hard.But you know what? it happened.I did and that's the truth ,this is what keeps me holding on because it hurts like hell to let you go.I know that I love you but I can't have you ."
If you have decided to be with this person then you need to learn how to handle the pain ,because this pain will hurt you less than leaving.
Embrace smile.Handle pain.